Inconvenient Relations Page 9

  During dinner Ruhi couldn’t eat much, but agreed the food was excellent. All of a sudden, she sprang up to embrace Debo. “I’ll miss you a lot.”

  “Miss me? Are you going somewhere, Shaan?”

  “Uh, no. Bee… Ruhi means to say she wants to see you every day.”

  “Of course you can, my dear. Drop by any day. I will love the company, and Anu adores you already.”

  “Yes, di, I will.”

  ***

  Back at the apartment.

  Shaan said, “I’m sorry. What happened was something I was afraid of.” Ruhi appeared not to hear; instead, she walked into the hallway bathroom and stared at the red dot on her forehead. She raised her hand then wavered…

  Why can’t I erase it as easily as before? Am I changing? Do I feel different? Is Bee a camouflage for Ruhi—a protective layer?

  No, it has to be done; I can’t afford to gamble with my emotions, she resolved, lifting her hand again. But when he looked at me today, there was something in his eyes I haven’t seen before. She wanted to cry out loud.

  Shaan stepped in; he had been watching silently for several minutes.

  Meeting her gaze in the large mirror, he turned her around. “Close your eyes.”

  A gentle puff of air swept over her forehead and erased the symbol. She felt her shoulders lighten, yet at the same time also a strange melancholy.

  “Ruhi…Bee?” She looked up.

  “I will never force you to do anything against your wishes, never. You can trust me,” He stated the words with a brief smile before turning abruptly and walking out, leaving her alone.

  He didn’t see the lone tear roll down her cheek.

  Ruhi, Shaan, marriage, love.

  Bee, Grey, friendship, or mere affection?

  Interplay

  Ruhi knocked on her husband’s door. “Grey? Are you up yet?”

  “Just a minute! What’s up, Bee? Want something?”

  I bet she has concocted some kind of revenge for last night, he thought with trepidation when he saw her looking terribly innocent and oh so cute holding a cup of coffee in her hand with her face scrubbed squeaky clean, a natural pinkish hue on her cheeks, and her heavy mass of hair caught up in a crooked bun. But the aroma from the fresh brew was strong enough to infuse him with happy serotonin.

  Happy enough he wondered, How would she react if I kissed her? She would probably run a mile or worse use that Swiss army knife. Better to be safe than sorry. He grinned sheepishly hoping she hadn’t read his mind.

  Midnight eyes appraised him. It’s obvious he hasn’t slept much. His eyes are puffy, he looks haggard, and also a little nervous. He’s probably anxious about last night. Well I’m not going to make him feel any better!

  “Just wanted to check my e-mail, haven’t done so ever since I got here.”

  “Oh what an idiot I am!” he said, running fingers through his tousled hair. “Of course you need to access your stuff. I should have given you the password. Let me do it now.”

  Holding the door wide open, he said, “Come on in. Sorry it’s a mess.” He grinned ruefully while scrambling to right the bedsheets and scoop up the pillows, which had fallen to the floor. “I’m not used to having visitors,” he added, gathering up the books and magazines, which lay scattered all over.

  “These happen to be my faithful sleeping companions, and I guess they’ll continue to serve that purpose for a long time,” he muttered, stealing a glance at her and was rewarded by a deep blush of discomposure.

  “Here’s your coffee. Shall we?” she said, thrusting the cup sharply toward him.

  She is gutsy, that’s for sure, he grudgingly admitted to himself while clearing the miscellaneous paraphernalia from his desk.

  His life is full of books, papers, and the occasional woman—and in that order, she thought conjuring up the picture of the mysterious Des in her mind. The perception was so hilarious she clamped a hand on her mouth to stifle laughter.

  His eyebrows scrunched together. “Something funny?”

  She shook her head; her body shaking with mirth. “It’s just that our situation is so odd. People would have a tough time believing it.”

  “Then it’d be better not to reveal the truth, wouldn’t it?”

  Oh yes! Better for you while I prepare myself to be hanged and quartered.

  “Here you go. The username is…” He looked embarrassed. “I should change it.” He wrote it down on a piece of paper. She looked at it and started to laugh again.

  “Seems like our lives can be defined by a series of four-letter words.” Then she muttered something, which caused his jaw to drop. “And don’t you dare tell me it’s not ladylike to swear, Grey!”

  “I won’t. Didn’t know you could handle it.”

  “I can. I went to college.”

  He laughed. “I think that’s justification enough. The password is worse. You can change it.”

  She did. “Now, if you will give me some privacy please.”

  “Oh, yes of course,” he said, walking out of the door.

  She scoured through the e-mails, most of little consequence, which she deleted without opening. Among the rest were some that included references and certificates from her work and school, which she had made requisitions for before embarking on this nightmare of a journey.

  I guess I was counting my chickens before they hatched, but what else is a new bride supposed to do? Stop dreaming?

  Cousin Vinay had sent some pictures he’d taken at the wedding; her piqued fingers hovered over the attachments.

  “I have to see how naïve and gullible I was before I came to know the truth.” She hadn’t yet looked at the wedding album, which lay hidden and almost forgotten in the deepest recesses of her suitcase.

  That’s not me, she thought, contemplating the image of a girl dressed in bridal finery smiling brightly at the camera. Ruhi has lost her innocence; she is now an experienced woman of the world who has been there and done that thanks to her husband. She frowned, at least he turned out to be good for something.

  He looked suave in red and bloody sincere as well. She spied a lot of envious looks pointed in her direction—a goodlooking, well-established groom from a well-to-do family. What else could a girl ask for? How she wished they were here looking at her right now.

  “You are looking drop-dead gorgeous in those pictures.” She heard his voice utter softly from behind.

  “But apparently, that didn’t work in my favor.” She swiveled around, her eyes blazing.

  He didn’t wither. “There are plenty of things that do.”

  She flushed. “A little too late to realize that, aren’t we?”

  “Ruhi…”

  She turned back, dismissing him, and started typing furiously on the keyboard. He sighed and sat on the bed, opening the manila envelope, which Sujoy had handed him yesterday. He hadn’t found the time to go through the contents in detail though most of what he had gleaned made him feel excited and nervous at the same time.

  Yes, this is what I had been waiting for: a step into the big league, membership into an exclusive club, which only admits the best and the brightest. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath savoring the feeling of success. It’d be nice to share the spoils with someone else.

  And that someone is you, Ruhi.

  His eyes snapped open, waking up as though from a period of prolonged darkness and ignorance. Nothing seemed more real or true. She belonged here with him. She was the only one whom he could think of sharing his joys and sorrows with. Des had been someone he had latched onto at a moment of weakness, and with hope she’d give him what he hungered for. But she had used him, sucked him dry, leaving him so thoroughly disillusioned he’d committed himself to a life of loneliness.

  But this girl sitting in front of him was different. He felt drawn to her despite every
thing, and whatever she did to irk or irritate him pulled him closer. What had wrought this change in him, he wasn’t certain, perhaps it was her pluck. Or her ‘I won’t take it lying down’ attitude, but regardless, he was sure he didn’t want her to leave in three weeks.

  But making her stay would be an entirely different affair.

  Maybe I can reason with Bee; she is definitely more approachable.

  ***

  At least I have found myself and know what I want, he thought smiling while reading the letter again.

  Mr. Shaan Ahuja, you have been chosen to participate in a highly ambitious and confidential mission from among a group of exceptionally deserving candidates. Due to your brilliance and hard work, you have earned yourself a place amongst the topmost tier of engineers. You have passed the first and most important preliminary step; the final decision will be made after a rigorous selection process.

  What would it involve? He wondered. Whoever drafted these official letters fancied themselves to be CIA agents in training. He chuckled.

  “Grey?”

  “Hmm?” He looked up; she seemed flustered.

  “Uh…” She wrung her hands as though in a stiff conflict. “I have a close friend who is getting married next month.”

  “Do you think it’s a good idea?”

  “What?” She stared at him as though he had uttered something absurd. “Yes, I think it is a good idea because she has known him for years, and Abhay is best for her.”

  “Then Abhay is a lucky man.” It’d be a tough job for any guy to win her approval. I envy this Abhay.

  “Because he is engaged to my friend?”

  “No, because you think so highly of him. I bet there are not a lot of men out there who belong in the category.”

  She smiled, catching his trend and capitalized on it. “You are absolutely right, and that’s why I want him to marry my best friend.”

  “So what’s the problem? Give her your blessings.” He didn’t like Abhay.

  “The crunch is, she’s having last-minute jitters. Says she won’t tie the knot unless she convinces herself arranged marriages work, and no matter how much I try to reason with her, she won’t get it!”

  “So what does she want?” He asked, walking up to her.

  “She wants to see us, you and me, right now with her own eyes and decide either way.”

  “How would it help her?”

  Ruhi flushed, disconcerted. “She wants to analyze us, determine if we’re happy or not, and this silly girl believes she can do it by observing us together. She fancies herself to be highly intuitive!”

  “So you want to show her that we’re happy?” he asked with a playful smile.

  “I do, but I’m not sure it’ll work out,” she said with a skeptical pout.

  “We can always try to pretend. After all, Bee and Grey are friends, and they don’t exactly hate each other, do they?” he whispered, squatting next to her chair.

  “I… I have no idea what happy couples look like though.”

  “I do, just follow my cue,” he assured while turning the webcam on.

  Radhika, a girl around Ruhi’s age with a cap of curly dark brown hair whose astute eyes spoke a lot about her intelligence, was eagerly waiting at the other end.

  Switching on his charm, he addressed her, “Hi, Radhika, I am Shaan, your friend’s most ardent admirer.” He winked slyly at Ruhi who glowered back.

  Giving both her shoulders a tight squeeze, he whispered harshly into her ear, “Damn you! This is an act!”

  “Hi, Shaan! Wow! I’m Radhika. I should probably not look.”

  Ruhi’s pal giggled and blushed.

  “It’s working! Your turn. Go on!” he urged.

  “Wha…at?”

  Ruhi couldn’t say anything but grin like an idiot at the camera. His close proximity was driving her pulse haywire and compelling her to retreat as far away from him as possible. How was he able to do such a good job at pretending?

  “Damn you, Bee,” he muttered under his breath. Then aiming a brilliant smile at the camera, he said, “I don’t remember seeing you at the wedding. My sweet wife must have made you aware I never forget a pretty face. Didn’t you, precious?”

  What is he talking about suddenly turning all cryptic on me? Does he mean Des? Take your bloody hands off me! Ruhi stomped his foot hard enough to make him loosen his grip but not for long.

  This weird but intimate interplay was not lost upon the captive audience at the other end who chipped in, “Hey! Don’t forget about me. I’m still here!”

  “Oh yes! Sorry, Radhika! As you can see, my wife has me completely under her spell,” he said, bringing his face close to her warm cheek and inhaling deeply. Gosh! Does she smell good?

  “I get why Ruhi has not been in touch ever since she left home,” Radhika said, her face turning deep red.

  “Radhika, I’m sorry but we… I mean, Shaan and I…” Unable to proceed further, Ruhi gave up.

  “Have been otherwise occupied. Hmm?” he said, appearing to complete her sentence, speaking her mind, fulfilling an irresistible urge. Then he turned his intent gaze upon her as if sharing a deep and intimate secret; his brown eyes speaking volumes trapped her within. She couldn’t look away.

  “Ruhi!”

  Gosh! What was I thinking? Thank God for nosey friends. “Ye…es! Radhika, sorry…I forgot. Grey—I mean Shaan…Lord!”

  “It’s okay, dear. I got what I needed. I won’t be a bother anymore. Thanks and bye, Shaan!”

  Radhika signed off with a broad smile on her face. It was exactly what Ruhi had wished to see, but her own heart was in a mess.

  Shaan withdrew from her reluctantly, her allure having taken a definite hold on his senses.

  Swiss army or not, those lips were meant for kissing. He sighed.

  With her hair now spread like a dark cloud over her shoulders framing her delicate face, she looked like a lost waif, fragile and breakable.

  No, I cannot afford to make a single error, but the going’s getting tougher. I need to pretend some more. “Give me a five, Bee! I think she fell for it hook, line, and sinker,” he exclaimed, grinning broad with delight and victory.

  I did too, almost. There was a bitter taste of regret in her mouth.

  Reactions

  Ruhi and Shaan stood in front of each other in an awkward silence. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath to ventilate her insides. Then appearing to have made up her mind, she stepped up to him, grabbed the coffee cup from his hand, and marched out of the room.

  “Hey, but I’m not done yet,” he called after her in vain.

  There was a loud clatter as the cups were violently dumped in the kitchen sink, the sound of a brief run of water from the tap, and a few seconds later he heard the front door close with a decisive bang.

  “God! This girl’s bent on driving me insane!”

  He hurried into the living room and for sure she had left. Her sneakers were missing and so was her cell phone. Thank heavens! But she had left her wallet behind; she won’t go far, he surmised. Dropping down on the sofa, he held his head in his hands. “Is this what I want to live with, the rest of my life?”

  He smiled shaking his head slowly in resignation. “Yes, I’m pretty sure of it now. Might as well get used to her ways.”

  Glancing at the clock, he estimated he’d give her a couple of hours, hoping by then she would have walked long enough to be willing to listen to reason.

  But this time, Ruhi didn’t walk, she ran.

  She ran—away from her feelings and warped-up emotions, away from herself and what she feared she had become. She ran to escape reality.

  She paused at the bus stop where she had met Sunshine but didn’t find her there, and it concerned her. She had developed an affinity for the elderly woman. Perhaps she has a date today, and old or not,
she deserves all the happiness she can get.

  With a smile, Ruhi thanked her. Sunshine had taught her a very important lesson—live life to the fullest and with no regrets. It was something she had to remind herself of constantly. I have to achieve that goal before it’s too late.

  She turned right at the corner, then continued straight ahead following the route of the Orange line bus. It was a long, seemingly never-ending boulevard, which changed its name from Rosemead to Orange Grove as if it changed its character, twisting and curving before straightening out again.

  The road’s like me, she mused. It reflects the way I’ve been trying to fool myself by assuming the guise of Bee.

  I am still the same young and vulnerable girl who had come here seeking to win undying love from her husband. But he ruthlessly killed the dream, and now after I had allowed the wound to scab over, he has laid it open again, so it feels as fresh as the day it was first inflicted.

  The street signs grew blurry as tears filled her eyes, and she waited for the traffic light to turn green at the crosswalk.

  No, he cannot do this to me, he cannot be so mean. He was pretending, that’s all.

  But it had felt so real. The way he had looked at her, the pressure of his fingers on her skin, the words he had spoken—everything was so sincere. And for one—for just one ludicrous moment—she wondered, what would it feel like if she let him make love to her, the way only a man could love a woman?

  She stopped in her tracks, dazed and breathless. “No, Ruhi! Stop daydreaming. Banish those thoughts from your mind. They are sinful, taboo.”

  But the tiny inner voice persisted. They are not. You are wedded to him and physical intimacy is a natural consequence.

  “He doesn’t love me, and I believe there can be no intimacy without love and trust.”

  But he did say he was done with Des. Didn’t he mean it?

  “He is a player. Someone who toys with the hearts of young and innocent women like me.”

  But there has been no hint of misbehavior. He has been nothing but the perfect gentleman since you met, she argued with herself.